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Kobold Genitalia Thread: Race to the final page



  • Agreed on sheath angular placement. After all, that's one very significant change evolution made in going from quadraped to bipedal.
  • @Dorian Yeah, that makes sense and would work better with the HTP thing you guys developed.

    @brownhair798 I regret nothing boyfriend unit. ~_~
  • edited May 2017
    Does evolution exist in urealms?
    did kobold evolve dicks?
  • It's believed, I think, that kobolds evolved from an early ancestor of groundbolds. However, with no mention of groundbolds in lore ever since Band of Thieves, to my knowledge anyhow, this is merely a theory.
  • A tabletop game theory. :dank:

  • But Thor made kobolds how does that work @TaeyRurj ;
  • edited July 12
  • @Dorian I also do see them working like vorcha in mass effect where they can evolve during their lifetime, and i don't think URealms would have a faster evolution cycle for either a certain race or all of them, and if i remember, modern kobolds as we know them should be recent, i estimate around 100 years or so.
  • @Dorian we don't even know if dna is a thing in urealms, also mutations might not be a thing either. We don't know. Also if we assume evolution could happen, with ageless and dragon silver it would never happen because the weak survive
  • edited July 12
  • @Dorian you used a real life example to discribe something in urealms.  :\  
    evlolution would not accrue because old traits wouldn't die off. 
  • 18 comments away from this tread having 420 comments lol  :)
  • @kreeperkiller63 Old traits don't need to necessarily die off though. If they didn't work then yeah they'd be gone, but if they still exist then there is still some type of advantage to it. :smileporc: 

  • @Quizicalgin old trait with no advantage  wouldn't die off if the carriers of that trait don't die off, which they would live on because of dragon silver and ageless
  • I'm not sure if ageless are a concern to evolution, since it's not clear if they can reproduce. The only known way for new ageless to appear is for an already alive being to be converted into an ageless. Dragon silver probably would be a valid concern, though it's likely it mostly just applies to the elves. The elves seem to be the only race with significant access to silver.
  • Okay yeah, just started Murder Bros, and Rawb compared the kobolds and groundbolds​ as like "us to apes". That's probably all I am thinking about in terms of "evolution".
  • edited May 2017
    Evolution would probably still occur, but the traits would be limited to certain populations. There's still competition for mates and such, right? Wait, lemme break out my biology notebook and put away my anatomy textbook...
    According to my notes and some quick googling, Kobold evolution would require:
    genetic variation among Kobolds;
    more Kobolds born than can survive;
    fierce competition for resources;
    and Kobolds with selective advantage (best "fitness) survive and reproduce.
    Then, over many generations, the allele frequency for a certain mutation increases and the allele becomes prevalent in the population.

    Maybe the world of URealms is way more like a Precambrian Earth. There'd be population explosions and tons of speciation because anything goes when it's easy to get food. Seriously, though, there are some really weird Precambrian creatures.

    The weak may survive, but that doesn't mean the weak pass on their genetic information. Ageless can't breed, I think, unless those bones aren't just for show. If they aren't infertile, I give up.

    But yeah. They may not have DNA or whatever, but based on the fact that there are traits like "Deformed", I assume that mutations are a thing. Or maybe its not. Dunno. Wait, why does it matter, again?

    Oh, yeah, depending on the timescale, there probably isn't much evolution at all. It's probably a young world.
  • Let's see if we can get porc evolution to work  >:)
  • edited May 2017
    Oh, and I'll try to add some insight to the whole food debacle.

    The human stomach receives food from the esophagus, mixes food with gastric juice, initiates protein digestion, carries on limited absorption, and moves food into the small intestine. Perhaps Kobolds have an extremely important digestive enzyme which breaks down rocks, but I find that unlikely. I think Kobolds probably have some sort of inorganic catalyst and/or acidic compound which helps them break down rocks. Vinegar, for example, breaks down carbonates really well. Maybe some kind of really cool abrasive? I dunno. I'm not much of a chemist.

    I'm not entirely sure if the acid would result in diarrhea or anything like that. I mean, our stomachs are highly acidic, but the result is just an acidic paste more than anything. I could be wrong, though. I'm not an expert on the digestive tract. 

    Digestion primarily occurs in the small intestine, where digestive enzymes embedded in the microvilli break down most of the things it actually wants to absorb. After it absorbs all the nutrients and stuff, it's passed along to the large intestine. I should mention, though, that the acidity is neutralized by secretions from the liver and mucous from the goblet cells, so I think it's fine if Kobolds have some highly acidic stomach acid or w/e you want. 

    The large intestine absorbs water and electrolytes from the remaining chyme. The secreted mucus protects the large intestine from any abrasive action and binds particles of fecal matter. So maybe kobolds secrete hella mucous which binds everything together in the end? Not really sure.

    TL;DR: Kobold poop is probably fine.

    I have a few questions, though: How heavy are kobolds? They can swim, right? So unless they trap hella air in their coat, shouldn't they sink due to their rocky exterior? How would Maelstrom be able to swim unless their coats were just fur? Also, any ideas on how they stay cool with all these complex chemical reactions going on?

    edit: added in the description of the digestive tract and edited out the irrelevant bits. It even makes some sense now.
  • Has no one considers the wiki? It answers half of these questions. 

    "Kobolds are a small mammalian race with sharp claws that are often found residing in caves and rocky habitats. Most Kobolds dislike getting wet, likely due to their preference of a dry, dark habitat. They have an outer layer of rock and mud that gives them the appearance of fur. This appearance allows them to blend into surrounding mountains and rocky terrain. The Kobold genealogy is affected by the geological location in which they are born, causing Kobolds in desserts to become Sandbolds and ones in snowy areas to become Snowbolds."

    "Kobolds generally considered to be slightly shorter than dwarves with bestial features. They have long ears, small eyes that are mostly black in color with a slight highlight that varies from Kobold to Kobold, and have a furry appearance that actually camouflages their fur's true nature of being rocky materials. These rocky materials vary in colors from various red hues to even charcoal grey. As a Kobold ages, their rock fur beings to lose its pigment and begin to appear grey, as seen with Bromas. It is unknown what designates the hue of the fur nor how the pigment can fade.

    Beyond their unique exoskeleton fur, Kobolds share many biological similarities to Elves, Dwarves and Gnomes. Female Kobolds have mammary glands similar to that of females of other races"

    To sum up what I see. Kolbolds fur is a rocky muddy substance that resembles fur but is an exoskeleton, like an ants skin. Their biology, aside from the grout of bones around their body, resembles that of elves, dwarfs, and gnomes. Human. They have human dicks and human vaginas. Happy now? When they get wet (and not the sexy one) their exoskeleton rubs off from the sound of it. A kobold becomes either a sandbold or snowbold dependent on their environment at birth. Not genetics. So this suggests that they slather them selves up in mud, dirt, sand, and snow and it stays their. This race sounds like they reek of BO and musky caves. They have canine features sure, but human-like parts under the skin. They shit. They piss. They can eat normal food too. DO YOUR HOMEWORK GUYS THE ANSWERS ARE RIGHT ON THE WIKI!

  • @Teh_Creep I just... *claps* I got nothing this is just really good. xwx
  • @Viizko Jesus, you could have voiced that a little better. Being a little bit rude.
  • @Viizko Rawb has never explicitly discussed Kobold genitalia, therefore there is no established canon. So we can dream of dicks as much as we want!
  • @TaeyRurj not trying to be rude, just pointing out you all missed some easy access knowledge, frankly this is probably one of my favorite posts right now lol
  • @Viizko Sorry, but it read as a little bit miffed/angry, so that's where my feeling of "this is rude" came from. Sorry again. Being someone neurodivergent means I interpret things very much different sometimes.

    But yeah, can't believe I didn't think to check the wiki. x-x

    I'd like to point out that, while it does say "share", that that doesn't necessarily equate to "similar" in the same sense that dogs share features with cars, but they're not identical, just similar. Wait, where am I going with this? I hate sick brain....
  • I suppose so @Teh_Creep but human dicks make the most sence
  • Your right, @TaeyRurj, however I feel it implies there biology is close enough for mating purposes, that being said, people Fuck dogs in our world. But in this one, a human dick makes more sense in my perspective and from context clues. However the important part isn't the dicks shape, but size. Lets say a kolbolds is designed to have sex with its exoskeleton on, then perhaps it's dick would have to be rather large for the act. A well endowed species by nature. 
  • Continuing on this note, are kolbolds genitals designed for pleasure or populating?
  • @Viizko Shhhhhh, let us dreamers dream
  • @Viizko, that is a very good point, actually. There's more that koboldpeen has to get past, so it'd make sense for it to be longer. Also a lot of us here are probably furries which is why we're thinking about the cani-dick. (Canidae dick lol.)
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