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UForums: The Stonequisition

(Art by @Nicksternick ( and @Femmipoo)

At the entrance of the Capital Office of Mt. Triton, a small group of Kobolds has gathered to meet with the First of all Kobolds. These Kobolds, however, are no normal Kobolds; they are the Sandbolds, a collective of Sandbolds that have formed a new Religion, and have been traveling from Tribe to Tribe and preaching their Gospel. However, the first of all Kobolds, Lady Anne, is a devout follower of the light, and she is not only troubled by this group of Non-Light Kobolds. She has also heard rumors of dark and sinister practices from this group. She has called them to immediately discuss these claims, and she is joined by her Assistant and Warden, Arlene.

"You wished to see us?" The Sandbold, Tien, asks.

"Yes," Anne says, trying to sound her smartest. "Like, I wanted to talk to you guys about some stuff I've heard about you guys."

"Oh?" Tien says, glancing at his associates, Talee and Varik, "What 'stuff'?"

"Well, I heard from a friend, who heard from a friend, that you guys eat Babies and bathe in blood. Now, as the First of all Kobolds, and totally devout to the Light, I, like, know these things aren't cool with Ouro'ras. You guys aren't, like, doing that shit in here, are you?"

Tien smirks. "Lady Anne," he says, "Do you understand how ridiculous that sounds? We don't eat Babies, or Children, and our fur is not bloody. We are just an organization that is trying to teach the Kobolds their true path, that is all we are."

"Like, the Kobolds true path is through Thor and Ouro'ras. Whatever they command is the true path."

"We understand you have your beliefs," Talee says, interjecting on behalf of Tien. "And we're not trying to enforce our own on any Kobold within this glorious Mountain. We advise you not to do the same to us."

"Advise?" Anne says, getting a little snippity. "Are you trying to advise me, you little c-" Arlene grabs Anne's shoulder before she says something she'd regret. Talee scowls a bit in anger.

"Alright, ladies," Varik says, trying to hold back a chuckle. "We don't want to start a fight here. Especially since attacking the First of all Kobolds, would be against the Law."

"You're damn well right it would be," Anne says.

"We apologize," Tien says retaking control of the situation. "But we can assure you we have never done anything illegal in our lives, nor are we doing anything illegal in this Mountain."

Anne looks at all the Sandbolds. "Like, very well," Anne says. "You Sandbolds are dismissed."

With that, the 3 Sandbolds, and their aides, depart from the front of the Capital Office.

"Huh," Arlene says, "You know, I was worried about the Sandbolds, but they seem to be alri-"

"I don't trust them, especially that fuckin' bitch," Anne says to Arlene, while not looking at her.

"O-oh!" Arlene says in slight surprise. "Y-yeah, I don't trust them either! Th-they're definitely up to no good!"

Anne then turns to Arlene. "Arly, like, aren't you one of those law people?"

"Yes, my Lady, I am."

"Great! Then you can just, like, get rid of them!"

"W-well, hold on, my Lady. W-we can't just kick them out or arrest them. Th-that's not how the Laws of the Light work..."

"Really?" Anne groans in disgust. "Alright, how do we get rid of them then?"

"W-well, w-we gotta prove th-they're violating the Laws."

"Like, aren't they already?"

"We have to prove they are, my Lady."

Anne again groans in disgust. "Alright! I give you full power to investigate these Sandbold guys. Do whatever it takes! We can't have Baby eaters in our fuckin' Mountain!"

"Y-yes my lady!" Arlene says bowing. "M-me and my Ward will get right on that!"

And thus, after a few moments of thinking of a name, the Stonequisition was born. The fliers were sent out immediately, and a collection of Light-Following Kobolds were gathered.

Weeks have passed, and the Stonequisition has been hard at work investigating the Sandbolds. So far, they haven't been able to prove anything about them, and their leads so far have been for naught. In an act of desperation, Arlene ordered the Stonequisitors to go undercover, and pretend to want to join the Sandbolds. After weeks of doing menial tasks like collecting charity for the poor and washing people's rock collections, all the initiates are finally being inducted into fledgling Sandbolds.

In a small abandoned church within Mt. Triton, the initiates gather for a party hosted by the Sandbolds to induct them into the organization. The Stonequisitors, as well as Arlene's Squire, Jimmy, have all come at roughly the same time. The Church is like almost every building in Mt. Triton, a building carved into the walls of the Mountain with dirt and mud placed on the floor. Destroyed Statues and images of Thor align the walls; some appearing to have been smashed with hammers, others appearing to have been partially eaten. A few Chairs and multiple tables are in the pulpit of the Church, and on the Tables are a variety of rocks that other Kobolds are currently eating.

So far, there are no signs of real Sandbolds, but since this is an initiation party, the Stonequisitors know that a few will be appearing any moment now. For now, the Stonequisitors have to lay low and mingle with the other Kobolds...



  • Cyastra giggles boredly and goes to speak with another kobold they haven't spoke with before, as part of her strategy to be well known with as many as possible. They adjust their sunsword emblem so it is noticable, and go to talk with another kobold in the room.
  • @Maris (Any in particular? Or do you want me to randomly pick for you? :p )
  • *Ivy will also go to talk to a koblod

  • @friskyBrisky They are looking for one they would not have spoke with before, no preference beyond that!

  • @friskyBrisky "ahh nothin like  party with some fine women to refuel the old moter ehehe" *Mhifu is just drinking whatever is available at the party, checking out the females there of course*
  • Sir jeoffry stands with perfect posture and gives out a very fake smile to those around him, trying to look imposing and superior to everyone around him. He’s also clearly impatient, tapping his foot loudly. 
  • @friskyBrisky
    Zan flicks through his Arcane Scriptures briefly, familiarizing himself upon his faith in a mix of the Light and some of the teachings of Quintarian Followers, watching the room for anyone of particular notice.
    After all, he's got plenty of experience with both street folk and more professional individuals.
  • edited December 2018
    @Maris @Pufflemore Both Cyrasta and Ivy, wanting to fit in to keep their cover, go talk to Kobolds they've never talked to. Cyrasta goes up to the 2 Female Kobolds in front of a large table. Ivy, meanwhile, goes to talk to the Man and Woman Kobold in front of the group.

    @Maris: Cyrasta doesn't overhear the conversation the 2 Women are currently having.

    @Pufflemore: Ivy, on the other hand does.

    "So," the male Kobold says, "How long have you been working for the Sandbolds?"

    "Oh," she replies, "just a couple of days now. Apparently I was really good at eating debris, so, they pretty much told me to come today."

    "Wow, I can't believe it only took you days. I've been at this for months!"

    "Huh, well, maybe you just suck."

  • @friskyBrisky "Hello there!" They wave, their non-drooped ear wiggling.
  • @friskyBrisky
    want did the rolls do?
  • edited December 2018


    @Jj_TeRroR_jJ The Kobold Squire, Jimmy, goes up to Zan.

    "I see you have
    an interesting book.
    Would you mind if I
    take a look?"

    He says politely, happily, and with a waggly tail.
  • @Pufflemore (Allow you to overhear a conversation.)

    @Rein Master Mhifu attempts to sneak peaks at girls, but is immediately caught by one of the other Women Kobolds (It can be one of the players :p ).

    @TinyBomby No one really pays attention to the smiling Kobold who's standing near the entry way.

    @Maris The two women Kobolds look at Cyrasta. "Oh, hello!" One of them says. "Are you here for ze initiation too?"

    The other Kobold rolls her eyes.
  • @friskyBrisky
    "Ello how are you guys?"
  • @friskyBrisky
    "Hmm? Well, as much as it'd be nice to share the direct scriptures, I'm afraid I have to politely decline on the basis that recklessness with this kind of scripture could wrought dangerous effects. It is a scripture of Quintara Lotus after all, capable of casting some of the most powerful spells of the realm."

    He says, taking quick note of his attire and general personality.

    "I could read you a safer scripture if you would so wish however..."
  • @friskyBrisky They nod. "I in fact am! I have trained much for this day. Very excited to join the sandbolds." They giggle, messing around with their sun emblem.
  • @Rein ;
    (Would you like my character to catch you being a perv)
  • @Pufflemore The two Kobolds turn. "Oh, hey there," the Male Kobold says. "How long did it take you to become a fledgeling?"

    "It only took me a few days!" The woman says.

    "Yeah, apparently," the Man says.

    @Maris "Cool!" The happier Kobold woman says.

    "Oh, come on Sistair," the more annoyed Kobold woman says. "You can't just greet every strangair you meet."

    "Oh?" the Happier Kobold says. "What about you and Josh?"

    The other Kobold scoffs a little. "Oh please," she says, "He waz ze one who bozzaired to greet me, not ze ozzer way around."

    "Right, right," the Happier Kobold says with a smile. "You have to forgive my sister, she's a bit on the uptight side." (I think you know who these two are now :p)


    "Quintara Lotus?
    Who are they?
    I've only just heard
    that name today." (Man, it is gonna be so fun to have an entire campaign with this character. :p )
  • @friskyBrisky
    He tilts his head curiously
    "Really now? You haven't heard of Quintara Lotus, Dragon Aspect of Arcane and Embodiment of the concept of Chaos?"
  • @friskyBrisky Cyastra giggles. "Sorry to disturb you both! But it is nice to meet you." They extend their paw for a handshake. "It is my honor to be in both yours' presence. I hope you see my initiation here soon! I'm excited!"
  • @Jj_TeRroR_jJ
    "I've only heard of
    The path of the Light.
    And after all
    That's the path that's right!"

    @Maris The happy Kobold shakes her hand. "It's our pleasure. By the way, I'm Ser'verah Mafris, and this is my sister Kneken."

    Kneken doesn't say anything, looking bored and slightly uncomfortable to be here.
  • @friskyBrisky ;
    Okay, Squire the porc is going to walk up to a random kobold to speak.
    "Hello hello there, rock one. I am Squire, and you are?"

  • @friskyBrisky "Nice to meet you both." They smile at Ser'verah, before looking to Kneken. "Sorry that it's not been very fun! But... I'm sure you'll find something fun to do here." They giggle. "Are you both sandbolds?"
  • edited December 2018
    @bl1ndn3rd Squire the Porc goes up to a random Kobold, specifically an older looking one sitting all by themselves.

    The Kobold doesn't pay much attention to the Porc. He seems to be staring into space with a serious intensity.
  • @Maris "Oh, I'm trying to become one," Ser'verah says. "I just invited Kneken over here. Especially since one of those Sandbolds has a crush on her."

    Kneken blushes a bit. "I-it'z not what you sink it is."

    "Nah, my Sister iz a bit too mature for dating."

    @Pufflemore "A week?" The male complains.

    "Ha!" The female laughs. "That proves it, you suck!"

    "Shut up!" The male yells.
  • @friskyBrisky
    He gives a slight chuckle
    "Well, of course the Light is a worthy path to follow, however it also has a couple of holes in it, which I find is where a few of the teachings of Quintara Lotus may assist."

    He says before flicking to a page and giving a cough.

    "For example, the Light swears in the defense of those whom are innocent and unable to protect themselves, yet the teachings of Quintara may also provide some valuable rites which can help in following the light greater without violating the teachings badly, such as. 'Thou may utilize greater powers in times where it may aid in ensuring success.', which can allow the use of darker powers upon the condition of great repentance upon achieving the greater good with such powers."
  • edited December 2018
    @friskyBrisky Cyastra giggles and looks at Kneken. "Ooh, who's the lucky sandbold? Perhaps I know them!"
  • @friskyBrisky ;
    Squire speaks in a loud and booming voice btw.
    "I said hello, sir. Do you hear me?"
    He moves in front of the kobold and tries to get his attention 
  • @friskyBrisky
    Drake asses the poor state that the church is in and approach any free kobolds not in conversation to engage them about this place.
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