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  • edited May 2018
    I feel like Flashbang should blind rather than stun, 750 gold seems a bit much given the cost of the abilities and Well Crafted is broken so that probably needs nerfing. - Personally I'd reduce the Grenades' AoE to just 2x2 rather than 3x3, and would reword Pin Trap to just "When a character" (just a tiny bit of simplifying there) rather than "an enemy (or ally)" since you could full-on argue that technically it shouldn't affect a neutral character then. - Edit/Addition 'cause I forgot to add this initially: Decent looking class though, sure has potential and could be pretty great with a few tweaks.
  • edited May 2018
    Ok thanks for the advice i will get to work on then @UnluckyBimi

    Edit: Fixed
  • @Sweatingdwarf123 Yo should't this go in Custom Cards and Assets?
  • Capitalize the D in dark please.
  • @Sweatingdwarf123 Those improvements seem good, now my only suggestions would be to tweak some of the grammar choices. "Grenade" should be capitalised on all of their names, and Dark Grenade should have a capitalised D in the Dark (like Pyre said).
  • edited May 2018
    Will do!

    Edit: fixed
  • i love classes with alot of randomness, like magician. this seems cool because of the AoE effect can be good for some spells.
  • Small comments here...
    What happens to spells dealing line damage, or bigger area damage, etc? Do they do that?
    Grenade Launcher: Sounds like a mortar dude, jeez. That's a lot of range.
    Pin Trap: Nice, though I don't see it being too effective due to a non-instant damage, especially versus standard power abilities. What else could Pin Trap do to a moving target?
    Grenade Vest: Hits the adjacent 8 spaces, and then you Death Roll. I doubt it will be too bad to increase the area to 5, though that is a matter of opinion.
    Being able to cast 1 Legendary per combat, even when some of them dud, will probably make Well Crafted more of a 500 cost than a 400 cost. But if the effect is all concentrated onto one area, I just wouldn't buy the card either way.
  • For spells with bigger area I would imagine the biggest area would take affect, but for line abilities such as arcane beam it would just remain as the 2x2 area.

    Pin trap is a very niche spell meant for tactical players and if the GM wants they could add a knock back effect

    Because the well crafted is placed at a smaller area I left it as a little cheaper. @knguy
  • First off, a little consistency pass with wording and capitalization on your cards to make them conform with the official URealms cards before I get in to my main critique:
    The phrase "Random [Element] Spell" should be capitalized wherever it appears.
    "Target" should be capitalized on your cards.
    The area gem should be a single number (2 instead of 2x2 or 3 instead of 3x3).
    Most of your grenades should be reworded as "Throw a grenade at Targets in an Area, [describe effect]"
    Pin Trap should say "anywhere on the Battlefield" (with battlefield specifically capitalized).
    Your Flashbang Grenade needs a range.
    The Area gem generally comes AFTER the Range gem.
    Most of your abilities should probably have the Item gem, as Grenades would be items. 
    Your Grenade Launcher should probably have a damage value. If you don't want it being used for damage then I reccomend 1.

    I'm aware that all of the above is very nit-picky, but I think bringing cards in line with the official cards wording and gem order makes classes look a lot more professional, which is always good. 

    Now, onto the main brunt of my critique, because I have some thoughts that I hope you enjoy. 

    Let's start with your grenades. I think the archetype of random spellcaster is all ready pretty well represented in URealms between the random spell draw we have available at CC and the many random spell casting abilities and item effects. I would reccomend retooling your elemental grenades, which are a very fun thematic idea, to move away from random spell casting. My personal reccomendation: All elemental grenades deal 10 damage in an area, and inflict the status associated with that element to all targets on Average Rolls and higher. You may want to consider an area of 3 with this change. 

    That leaves Flashbang obsolete, as the Light grenade would already be blinding people. You could either replace the card, or make it inflict Stun. If you do make it inflict Stun I reccomend buffing it to an area of 3 and making it Limited, because Stun is a pretty powerful status.

    As for your grenade launcher, 99 range on all your abilities is overkill. I reccomend you make it a 20 range weapon, and make it's passive effect "Item Abilities now have the maximum range of this weapon if their range is not already higher." The wording could probably be made more elegant, but I do think that with this change it's important that you say "the range of this weapon" instead of the number so that Gnomish Scopeye doubled the range of your grenades, because that sounds very fun.

    As for well crafted, I think you should drop the legendary spell component entirely. Many spells cast like that would be super complicated to figure out, and one every turn is really OP. You'll also notice that no legendary spell scroll granting passive requires you to cast it immediately, and I believe that's very deliberate so you don't Final Gift yourself or Rebirth yourself by accident. I reccomend that you instead make Well Crafted function like so: "Cast a Non-Limited Item Ability as a No-Roll Bonus Action. The Ability you use with this Bonus Action has an Area of 7." This makes the card seem more thematically accurate (whatever grenade you throw has clearly been well crafted) , has some fun synergy with potential treasures or random item draws (since it doesn't specify Grenade) and is less likely to accidentally Final Gift your character. 

    As for Pin Trap, I reccomend you rename it to Claymore because that sounds more explosive. You didn't expect a paragraph for every card, did you? :smile: 

    A buff for Shrapnel Grenade wouldn't be amiss since it's the classes main form of Damage even if you change the other grenades, but a damage buff just makes it a better Fireball. I reccomend adding "High Rolls increase the Area of this Ability to 4(or 5 maybe?)" 

    As for Grenade Vest, it's a fun idea but I think that as an ability a lot of people would never take it. I reccomend making it a passive that triggers when you fail a death roll, forcing adjacent Targets to Death Roll (perhaps twice) and dealing 99 Damage. And make it 10 Gold, so people will definitely pick it up if they have a free slot, because who wouldn't be a corpse grenade for that price! 

    If you've read this whole thing then congratulations, you've won! I don't know what you've won but you definitely did win it. These changes, while extensive, preserve the explosive theme of the class, but shift the archetype from the already existing random spellcaster to a type of crowd control support that URealms hasn't seen yet, while still dealing considerable damage.




  • edited May 2018
    I will get on most of that when i have the time! (The grenade launcher was just 99 mainly because it was a filler at the time) @GypsyCow

    P.S for well crafted spells that would need you to directly cast them would be duds, as the card states. (It's also once a combat not once a round)
  • @Sweatingdwarf123 Sorry, I meant combat. That's still incredibly powerful though, because it's a free roll every combat to see if you get an incredibly deadly spell in a 2x2 square, especially since most of the spells you could cast without it being a dud fall under the "this kills people very very well" category.

    In all honesty though, I'd have reccomended changing the card even if it was a once per game action. The mechanics of translating a multitude of incredibly diverse spells to a 2x2 and figuring out what would and wouldn't dud alone predispose me to making it into a mechanically simpler and perhaps more thematically appropriate ability even before considering how powerful the ability truly is. 
  • Yeah I see where your coming from @GypsyCow
  • Updated with both Varieties of the class!
  • edited October 2018
    Old thread but ill throw my input. The class is really neat, i would totally play it. Now for my ideas for the second set. The grenade launcher does need some nerfing. 20 range is huge distance, that's almost as much as Karl Landers. Same thing with the grenades, 10 range is ridiculous. Personally i would cut the range of them in half. So 5 range for grenades and 10 range for launcher, cause if you combine them with gnomishscopeye, all enemies on the field would no longer exist. I would also lower the starting gold down to about 300 or less. The total cost of the class is about 860 Gold, so if you had a dwarf grenadier, the class could just be bought outright. Another idea would be making consumable versions of the grenades and making an ability that gives players or allies 1 random grenade. 

    Just some thoughts really, but anyway it is a good looking class just needs some tuning and polishing!

    Edit: Adding Tag: @Sweatingdwarf123 ;
  • @Space_Runes i'm glad we are talking about this class again 
  • edited October 2018
    Thanks for the input I will get on implementing some of your suggestions @Space_Runes
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